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Living Your Strengths with Gallup’s StrengthsFinder

August 7, 2013 / Nicole Padley / 0 Comments

I was introduced to Gallup’s StrengthsFinder in 2004. At the time didn’t think much of it, except that it was just another personality test. Nearly eight years would pass before I would revisit this. Once I did take the time to understand more about this motivational tool it changed my whole perspective on things; the way I view myself, the way I relate to others and most importantly the way I approach God.

For those of you that are unfamiliar with Strengths, allow me to give you a brief rundown.

What it is?

StrengthsFinder is an online assessment that pinpoints a person’s five most dominant talents from a list of 35 traits which research has shown are common among all types of people from every different age, race, socioeconomic and generational group. Each of these talents carries with it an action item that aids both personal and professional development. The entire purpose of StrenghtsFinder is not only to supply you with a better knowledge of yourself, but in addition gives you the tools to turn your talents into strengths.

What it isn’t?

StrengthsQuest is not simply another personality test, not if it is implemented correctly anyway. While it does measure a person’s typical characteristics, it allows its participants to actively engage in exercises that will help in their overall growth.

How to use Strengths for ones self

Knowledge of my own strengths has obviously impacted me, but before I delve any deeper into this it is important I first explain my top five. These are the talents that StrengthsFinder has found to be the five areas where I hold the most potential in order of it’s….

Achiever – I take great pride and satisfaction from working hard and being productive.

Focused – I can choose a direction or goal and follow it through to the end.

Learner – I have a great desire to learn and want to continuously improve which is probably why I am so intrigued with Strengths.

Command – I have presence (or so I’m told). I can easily take control of a situation and make decisions.

Significance – I am independent (just ask my parents) and want my accomplishments to be valued.

StrengthsFinder has given me tools that I lacked before. It has allowed me to become less critical of myself. There is power in knowing who you are, and who you’re not. I know the areas in which I am already talented. This knowledge allows me to particularly tap into those talents. I am blessed with a natural skill in that area, so why not maximize it?

On the opposite hand, I am able to rest in the fact that there are just some things I am not as good at. That is not to say I couldn’t grow in any given area or another, but simply recognizes my weaknesses. The upside of this is that because I am aware of my talents, I can leverage these to grow in other areas.

How to apply Strengths with others

By understanding where other people’s talent lie I am able to better relate to them. Rather than working against another’s Strengths or trying to mold them into someone they aren’t I am able to more clearly see them for who they are. I am able to team up alongside them, allowing them the opportunity to tap into their own potential, while I can focus on what I can do well.

Take for example Pat’s top five:

Empathy – People with Empathy can easily sense the feelings of other people and relate to them in that experience.

Strategic – People who are especially talented in this theme create alternative ways to proceed when obstacles arise.

Ideation – People with talent in this area are fascinated by ideas. They are able to find connections between seemingly disparate phenomena.

Connectedness – Those with talent in this theme have faith in the links between all things. There are few coincidences and that almost every event has a reason.

Communication – Those with a talent in communication find it easy to put their thoughts into words. They are good conversationalists and presenters.

Insight into this aspect of him has helped me to appreciate that not everyone is like me. I know that sounds so simple and elementary, but honestly take a moment to think about how many times in the last 24 hours you’ve been annoyed that someone close to you has handled a situation in a slightly different way than you would have.

Anyone living in close quarters can attest that this happens all the time. We ruffle each other’s feathers. Knowledge of another person’s Strengths helps me to recognize the positive aspects of personality quirks that would be otherwise annoying to me. It ultimately helps me love others better, allowing them opportunities to apply their strengths in any given situation.

Our relationship with God

Last but not least, knowledge of my own Strengths has shaped the way I approach God. This knowledge of myself has helped me to better know my Creator; who He is and what He is about. He is the One who has given me these talents, and He is the perfection of my talents.

In addition to this, an awareness of my talents has helped me pinpoint spiritual capabilities as well as my temptations. I am able to concretely grasp significant points of my personality and bring these traits before the Lord, allowing Him to work with me through them.

UPDATE:

Here is my crash course in understanding your Strengths. I recently presented this to the Gregorian Fellows at Benedictine College.

Leading With Your Strengths – Crash Course in Gallup StrengthsFinder

Want to learn more?

Check out the following books: StrengthsFinder 2.0, Strengths Based Leadership, Living Your Strengths

Natural Family Planning: What’s Your Model?

July 27, 2013 / Nicole Padley / 2 Comments

As Natural Family Planning week draws to a close, I feel it’s important to distinguish between a few of the methods available. Since Patrick and I are preparing for our wedding day, we decided that it is important for both of us to understand my fertility so that we can together make responsible parenting decisions.

NFP offers a few different methods available to those looking for an alternative to birth control. I’ve laid out a brief description of the methods I am personally familiar with; Creighton Model and Symto-Thermal. I am also aware of the Marquette Method, but since I have no personal experience with that method I will leave the description to its experts.

Creighton Model

Sample Creighton Model Chart

The Creighton Model Fertility Care System (CrMS.) was introduced by Dr. Thomas Hilgers and fittingly named after where his research is based in Omaha, Nebraska. This is not your grandmother’s rhythm method. It involves tracking a woman’s vaginal mucus every day, every time you use the bathroom. A women’s time of fertility is determined by the mucus’s color, stretchability, and sensation.

The advantages are numerous. It is effective for any women’s cycle; regular or not so regular. It is inexpensive, running around $40 each time I visit my practitioner. Initially, I was setting up appointments with her more regularly in order to learn this method. Now that I’ve had some practice, I usually schedule a visit once or twice a year just to check in with her. This is much cheaper than birth control, which depending on your insurance coverage can cost up to $50 a month. Yikes…I’d rather spend that money going out to dinner with my husband.

Another advantage to using this method is that it seems more and more doctors are becoming familiar with it. Therefore, they can offer advice on any potential concerns there might be. This method can help you both achieve and avoid pregnancy.

Sympto-Thermal Method

Sample Sympto-Thermal Chart

Sympto-Thermal is another popular method used. STM was first organized in 1971. It combines the cervical mucus observations as popularized by Dr. Billings, the basal body temperature observations noted in the 1930s by Rev. Wilhelm Hillebrand and adds the optional observation of cervical position. In charting these three primary signs of fertility, a couple can determine their fertile and infertile times.

A woman practicing the STM model takes her temp with a basal thermometer at the same time every morning before getting up and beginning her day. (I like this 3M thermometer because it is cheap and continues beeping at the end) Throughout the day, she tracks her mucus pattern similar to Creighton just not as in-depth. She and her husband then use signs from both her mucus pattern and temperature to determine which phase she is in; pre-peak, peak phase or post-peak and base their parenting decisions off of this knowledge.

Interested? Want to know more?

This is a very high-level overview of two of the most popular methods of Natural Family Planning. I realize there are other methods out there, but again since I’ve personally had no experience with them I leave it to others to explain. If you have questions, I recommend asking your local Catholic diocese or contacting one of the organizations below.

Do you use STM or the Creighton Model? What do you like about it? What do you hate? Tell us about it!

http://www.creightonmodel.com

http://ccli.org

www.nfpandme.com

iusenfp.com

Stop Motion Save the Date Video [How to]

July 15, 2013 / Patrick Padley / 1 Comment

If you know us well, you know that we like to be unique. Our goal (aside from getting married) is to have our guests leave thinking, “that was very Pat and Nicole.” We were looking for a creative, yet economical way to inform our guests to mark their calendars for our special day. So we decided to send out a save the date email with a personal spin on it. Instead of just an engagement photo, we created a stop motion save the date video.

To create our stop motion save the date, we used the following:

Our iPhones
The iMotion HD app (free)
Apple’s iMovie

I highly recommend Finger Lab’s iMotion HD. It is both free and fully featured. In addition to these tools, here are a few other tips to keep in mind when creating your own save the date video.

Keep it simple

Not much to expand upon here; plan ahead. It’s great to have something complex and awesome, but the reality is that you are planning a wedding. Time is of the essence. My suggestion–keep it simple.

Make your video accessible

Grandma may not know how to use Instagram, but she can certainly check her email. We decided to send our video out over email simply because we knew that would work best for our family and friends. Your family may be different, so I suggest distributing it in a way that makes it easy to be viewed. Don’t be afraid to post it on Facebook, just because you can’t invite all your friends to the wedding doesn’t mean you can’t share your excitement with them.

Keep it under a minute folks

Be mindful that the goal of a save the date is two fold: #1 inform your guests of the upcoming big day and #2 allow them the opportunity to learn a little bit more about you as a couple, plus all those other important details (i.e. check out your wedding registry, website or whatever). No one wants to watch your next short film, keep it under a minute people.

So go out, have fun and make it personal. Engagement will fly by (or so others tell us) so try to enjoy the experience. What other save the date ideas have you all seen?

DIY Project: Facelift for any lamp

July 14, 2013 / Nicole Padley / 0 Comments

Summer is the time for DIY projects. This week I gave one of my treasured thrift store lamps a facelift. It’s an easy project even the most novice of crafters, and it saved me buying a new lamp. In fact the total cost ran me less than 20 bucks. So here is how you too can spruce up any old lamp.

Supplies Needed:

Yarn
Glue Gun
Painter’s Tape
Spray Paint + Primer

Step One:

Pick out whatever colors of yarn you like, I would recommend at least two or three colors. Decide on a pattern you want to do and if you are a newbie to this stick with something simple. Use a hot glue gun to adhere yarn to lampshade.

Note: Patience my friend, this is the most time-consuming part of the project. Go slow and don’t rush it. You want it to look nice in the end don’t you?

Step Two:

Make sure to clean off lamp stand before you begin any painting or priming. Usually I would recommend using separate primer before you even begin painting, but with a piece this small a combined paint and primer worked just fine.

Tape off any parts of the lamp stand you see fit.

Step Three:

Spray paint to your little hearts content or until you have finished covering the lamp stand. Wait to dry and voila!

The First Date (How We Met Part 4 of 4)

June 30, 2013 / Nicole Padley / 0 Comments

You know how people always tell you that when you are in love, you’ll just know it. That phrase always annoyed me growing up. Although I can’t say that I knew on our first date that I would grow to love and eventually marry Patrick, I did know that he was something different and that this could potentially turn into something more.

As I recounted earlier, one of the initial traits that really impressed me about this guy was the way he lived with such intention. On the drive back to Atchison later that evening at 2 a.m. Pat called to make plans for our date. I don’t recall much about the conversation except that we decided to plan to meet up the following afternoon.

This guy wasn’t about to waste any time and while some women might think this a bit too forward, I was flattered. Finally, a man who was willing to step up and well, be a man. It was refreshing.

SEE ALSO: How We Met Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3

The next day was spent prepping and primping as any lady would, even though we would never confess to such vain behavior. Patrick arrived on campus a little late only because he got lost. I didn’t mind though. I was so thrilled to finally have a date with this charmer. I mean I’d been waiting for nearly two months another half hour wouldn’t kill me.

When he finally did arrive on campus I met him at the campus church. As soon as he got out of the car to greet me, I suggested we begin our date with a prayer in one of the chapels. This ladies and gentlemen was a very strategic move on my part. I suggested this not only for the sake of paying honor to God and calming my nerves, but most importantly to test him out a little bit. After all, anyone can go to a young adult social and call themselves Catholic, but only people truly striving for holiness wouldn’t be utterly freaked out by this…and probably even some of them would be.

Intensity is my trademark and if this guy couldn’t handle a little awkward praying, then he sure wasn’t cut out to deal with my dramatics. Even though Pat thought this a little strange he went along with my idea and nervously led us in prayer. Ding….one point on the board for Pat Padley.

Next, I hopped in his hot ride (a Hyundai Sonata) and we hit the town… well, the neighboring town that is. Anyone who has ever visited Atchison, Kansas knows that this small community offers little to do for a budding romance.

We landed in Weston, MO and began our love story at Pirtle Winery. As Pat and I tasted the various wines, flirting shamelessly and trying to put our best foot forward we met a charming saleswoman with a distinct Southern drawl by the name of Miriam. She innocently inquired how long Pat and I had been married. Patrick, of course, thought he was scoring points; I turned all varying pigments of red and remember being quite thankful at that moment that he was so tall since it allowed me to hide my embarrassment. Little did either of us realize the foreshadowing that was happening in our very midst.

As we finished our tasting of the local wine we decided to wander around a nearby state park. We talked and talked and talked some more. Well Pat did, I was a little bit tipsy from the wine. Self-conscious I would say something ridiculous; I opted to play the mysterious card for a while.

We walked around the trails, which ultimately led us to the famous Weston State Park lookout where we enjoyed a breath-taking view of the sun setting behind a nearby power plant. Ah, the majestic sightseeing of the Midwestern plains. Seriously though, whose idea was it to have a state park’s lookout overseeing a power plant?!?! Only in Kansas, my friends…only in Kansas.

We ended the evening with dinner at my all-time favorite Irish pub, O’ Malley’s. There at the pub, we enjoyed live music, more conversation, and more beer. I know it sounds like we drank a lot on our first-date and come to think of it maybe that’s how he got me to agree to a second date.

Regardless, he did get a second date and a third with no alcohol involved. A year and a half later the conversation is still easy, he still makes me smile and he is still intentionally striving to honor and love me. I can only hope and pray that in 60 years I am continuing to return the favor.

6 Creative Ways to Use Engagement Photos

June 19, 2013 / Nicole Padley / 0 Comments

You did it. You and your soon to be spouse finally agreed upon a photographer, picked out coordinating outfits (or not so coordinating) and set aside some time to get your engagement photos done. You’ve spent money on these lovely portraits now what are you suppose to do with them? You and your fiancé are only this young and beautiful once so why not showcase your attractiveness in a creative and fun way? Here are a few ways to use your engagement photos for the wedding and your blissful life together afterwards.

1) Save the Date.

This one is an obvious choice. You can easily have your save the dates made through websites like snapfish or shutterfly at a reasonable cost. If you are feeling a bit more creative you can take a shot at making some yourself with Photoshop or Apple Pages.

2) Shower Décor.

There are lots of ways to incorporate your photos into bridal showers and bachelorette parties. Some are little more exciting than others. The floating chandelier is super easy to do for anyone who wants to add a touch of personalization to the party. Another easy way to display your and your beau’s pics is through garland.

3) Wedding Website.

My fiancé and I created a one-stop shop wedding website for our guests to peruse and find out all they need to know about our big day. Our engagement photos work as nice accents and backgrounds for the site. Need some ideas, check it out: www.patplusnicole.com

4) Cake Topper.

Pat and I will definitely be doing this for our wedding in November. It’s an inexpensive, DIY touch that adds a personal flair to your cake .

5) Centerpieces.

At first glance this might sound a little boring or uncreative, but there a numerous ways to use your photos as part of a larger centerpiece. Pintrest has plenty of ideas to inspire you. I personally love these DIY vintage photo mason jars.

6) Decorate your home.

I’m not simply implying that you throw your pictures in a few frames and hang it on the wall (although you can do that too), rather make something a little more unique. Check out this photo letter art. Better yet, try your DIY skills with this shabby chic picture window.

Well there you have it. That’s the best I’ve got. Have any other creative ways to use engagement photos? Share them with us in the comments below.

Real Men Ask for a Date (How We Met Part 3 of 4)

June 14, 2013 / Nicole Padley / 2 Comments

After Patrick and I’s dramatic and comical introduction, life assumed as usual. He didn’t call me. He didn’t text me. We didn’t hang out, except occasionally with groups of friends. While he did take his time in pursuing me, what impressed me most about Patrick is that he was the first man I met in a long time who was intentional and deliberate. He knew what he was about.

After our first meeting, I did my best to push him out of my mind and go about my normal life. After all, I lived an hour away from KC. I had plenty going on in my day-to-day life that kept me busy. So why would this guy make anything different? Yet for some reason, I couldn’t seem to let go of the feeling I had while in line for confession. Nearly two months passed and I continued to try to forget this guy. Then one simple prayer before Mass changed everything.

The day was a routine Saturday. Clare and I drove to KC to hit up the Plaza Art Fair. This was a must, not because we are avid art-lovers, but rather avid people-watchers. We met up with Paul, Pat, and some other friends to hang out. I distinctly recall being quite frustrated during that afternoon for multiple reasons, the main one being that I couldn’t get over this crush. I was frustrated that I cared so much about this guy while he seemingly had no interest in me at all. I was frustrated with myself that I couldn’t just let it go and enjoy his friendship. I was mostly annoyed with God. I mean seriously…I was open to His will. His will didn’t seem to be Pat, so why was I getting so caught up in my emotions? All of these annoyances were weighing on me during that autumn afternoon, and I had just about had enough.

SEE ALSO: How We Met Part 1 and Part 2

Clare and I decided part with the group to go to evening Mass. As I walked into Our Lady of Perpetual Help I was overcome with emotion…mostly the urgency to pray. We found a pew, I knelt down, pouring out all my emotions and frustrations to God…almost to the point of tears. Moments before Mass began I felt covered in a sense of peace and then one single phrase came to mind: “Relax. Rest in me. It will all make sense tonight.”

I don’t why this of all phrases came to mind. As usual, though I brushed it off as my own craziness and nothing to be paid much attention to. However, life was about to present me with different plans as it so often does.

After Mass, Clare and I once again met up with a group of friends to go country dancing…chuckle you might, but this is a legitimate and rather enjoyable pastime in the Midwest. Patrick insists that he was flirting with me all night, I beg to disagree. In fact, I was convinced that he wanted nothing to do with me.

Late into the evening as things we coming to a close, Pat and I were on the dance floor. He confidently led me through a two-step as I fumbled along pretending I was an experienced dancer. I can recall making note that his palms seemed quite sweaty for the occasion, still, I didn’t think much of it. As the song was reaching its last refrain, he asked me out. He didn’t ask to hang out sometime, or grab coffee. He didn’t clumsily ask to go to dinner. He confidently and without skipping a beat asked me if I wanted to go out on a date.

One of the earliest things I can recall appreciating about Patrick was his sense of pursuit. He made his intentions clear, and later that night as Clare and I were driving back to Atchison he called me at two in the morning to make plans for our date. All I could think was wow, this guy knew what he was about and what could be more charming than that?

Find out what happens next: Read Part 4, The First Date >

A Couple of Catholics